Dream Life Vol II Chapter 64: “Growth”

　It is July 9, year 313 of the Tria calendar.

　Today, I returned to my hometown, Rathmore Village.

　And I am really enjoying my homecoming, seeing old faces.

　The Zack Quartet – me, Mel, Dan, and Sharon – gathered together for the first time in a long time, reported to each other on recent developments, and concerned about Mel and Dan’s dangerous training, decided to keep them under their own radar. And they happily agreed to do so.

　I was relieved to hear that but realized that I had not yet told them something important.

　Yes, I had not told Mel and Sharon, the two girls who love me, about my honest feelings.

(I’m still not good at talking about these things. But I can’t procrastinate…) (Zack)

　I straightened up a little and spoke to them both with a serious look on my face, “Let me change the subject, okay?”

　The three of them, including Dan, gave a small tilt of their heads at my expression, then quickly nodded.

“I have something to say to Mel and Sharon. I realize that you two think you like me…” (Zack)

　When I said this, they both turned bright red and looked down. Furthermore, Dan, who is interested in Mel, has a confused gaze.

　I didn’t care how the three of them looked, I just kept talking.

“I also like the two of you. But this is not a romantic feeling…” (Zack)

　Mel looks up at these words, and Sharon turns her head even more.

“You remember I told you that my soul is about the same age as my grandfather – Govan Lockhart, the previous lord. To me, the two of you, no, the three of you, are like my grandchildren… It’s hard to say how, but I love you both. But it’s not romantic love.” (Zack)

　Mel bit her lip and Sharon looked down and didn’t move.

“You don’t understand what I’m saying. You two are misunderstanding me because I look like a child. If I looked like your grandfather or Walt, Squire Walt Vassell, you probably wouldn’t feel the way you do now…” (Zack)

　As I said that much, Mel interrupted me.

“No! I have… I always had feelings for Master Zack.”  (Mel)

“I know what you mean, Mel, but you’re just a sweet kid to me. So…” (Zack)

　Mel looked a little hollow,

“Ms. Beatrice, is that why? Ms. Beatrice is here, and you don’t need me anymore…” (Ml)

　She thought I stop caring, but I quickly dismissed her words.

“No! I certainly like Beatrice… This doesn’t mean that you’re not family. It means that I like her as a woman. Of course, Liddy too…” (Zack)

　Then Sharon looked at me with a slightly downcast look in her eyes.

“From the perspective of Master Zack and the Founder, isn’t Ms. Beatrice at the age of a child…” (Sharon)

　I shake my head and deny it.

“Beatrice and Liddy are both grown women. They are adults who can take responsibility for their actions.” (Zack)

　Sharon began to speak timidly.

“Then you’re saying that if we grow up… and are recognized by Mater Zack as adult women, you’ll see us that way too, right?” (Sharon)

　I was at a loss for an answer.

(Sharon has a point. If you ask me if there is zero possibility, including the future, I have no choice but to say I don’t know. I would probably not feel that way if it were my child, but I didn’t have a child. That’s why if I was asked if I could see her as a ‘woman’, I would be at a loss for an answer…) (Zack)

　As I remained silent, Mel’s eyes lit up.

“By not answering, it means that if Sharon and I grow up, you might see us as women. Okay… you don’t have to answer right now. I know I am a ‘child’ for now!” (Mel)

　Sharon nodded in agreement,

“I’m still no match for Ms. Lydia and Ms. Beatrice. I’m still… but if I work harder… I’ll be able to…” (Sharon)

　It seems that my explanation had failed.

　Mel mutters to herself and no longer talking to me.

“If I can stand next to Mr. Zack… No, I will never lose to her. My place is only next to Master Zack. I won’t let her take it…” (Mel)

(I feel like there’s nothing more I can say right now. Maybe it’s a cowardly idea, but maybe it’s better to wait for things to calm down… at least I will make sure Beatrice knows what happened…) (Zack)

“I’ll say it again. I see Beatrice as a woman, not to mention Liddy. I don’t know what I’m going to do about it yet, but at least I’m going to make sure she knows how I feel about her.” (Zack)

　I said these words with determination, but neither Mel nor Sharon reacted much. I was about to say something when Mel smiled and began to speak.

“I understand. But I don’t approve of Ms. Beatrice, let alone Ms. Lydia. It may sound strange for me to say this, but I have decided that I will stand beside Master Zack. …So tomorrow, I will ask Beatrice if she is ‘determined’.” (Mel)

　I was acutely aware that I didn’t understand women.

(She is still twelve years old and already thinking this far? I’ve heard that women are more precocious but to this extent… I feel like tomorrow is going to be terrifying…) (Zack)

　Having said all that, Mel said, “Thank you for the gift. I’ll have Mother fix it up,” and stood up.

　With that, Sharon and Dan got up as well.

　I left the mansion with them, intending to take the girls home.

　After parting with Mel at the Marlon’s, we headed next door to the Jakes’ house.

　Dan and Sharon said good night and were about to enter the house when I stopped them.

“Dan, I need to talk to you. Can I talk to you for a minute?” (Zack)

　He looked a little strange but quickly nodded. We walked in the moonlight to the grassy meadow where the pavilion was located in the pasture on the hill.

　The breeze blowing through the hills was quite cool, and Dan and I sat down in a suitable spot.

　It was a quiet place with only the chirping of insects around us.

“Hey, how do you feel about Mel? No, you still like her, don’t you?” (Zack)

　I asked that out of the blue.

　Dan’s face flushed so red that it was clearly visible even in the moonlight.

“Tell me the honest truth. As I said before, I feel like I’m Mel’s father or grandfather. But Mel thinks she loves me, or in this case, I guess you could say she’s in love with me.” (Zack)

“Are you in love…?” (Dan)

　I nodded, “Yes,” without looking at him.

“My experience in love, including my old life, is not much. So, I can’t say anything deep about it, but girls that age are longing for love. I sometimes mistakenly think I’m in love with someone who is in love with me. …I say to myself, I’ve been mature since I was a little kid. …I’m actually an adult… …It’s possible that they admire me because I am mature. Maybe they’re confusing that longing with love…” (Zack)

“Confusing longing with love? …I’m not sure.” (Dan)

“I don’t know. I’m sorry, I don’t understand it well either. …hahaha… No, sorry. It’s strange for me to talk about love…” (Zack)

　As far as I was concerned, I had never experienced love.

　Sure, I’ve been married and had girlfriends in junior high and high school. However, in my case, I was always rejected by my partner who ran away from me. It was strangely funny that I was talking to Dan about love in such a high-handed manner.

　But Dan didn’t laugh at me and quietly thought about something.

　I couldn’t stand the silence, so I went on with my story.

“Going back to the topic, you like Mel, don’t you? To the extent that you went along with dangerous training after listening to Mel’s selfishness… But you know that Mel likes me, so you can’t say anything about that. You won’t. Am I right?” (Zack)

　Dan looks down in embarrassment as if to prove my point.

“What I care about is you stepping aside for me and for Mel. You are much like your father, Guy. Honest, loyal, and… Have enough grit to stand up for me…” (Zack)

　Dan listens to me with a small shake of his head and a nod.

“I’m not a normal human being. Oh, this isn’t about being sent by God. I have memories from before this life as Zacharias Lockhart. That’s what I’m trying to say. Yes, I’m living a second life. So, I’m going to be able to do things better than most people. This is not about my ability. If anyone has been through it once, and it didn’t work out, they can do better the next time. That’s all there is to it.” (Zack)

“But I think Zack is a really great person. He does things that I would never think of doing, or that no one else would think of doing. That’s why…” (Dan)

“I guess from the point of view of people in this world, yes. But the fact is, what I’ve done is no big deal. I’m not a great person by any means. I just have memories from another world. So, I want you to take care of your own life. Don’t suppress your feelings by thinking you’re stepping aside for me or that being there for Mel is the best thing for her. Mel will realize this someday. She will realize who cares about her the most…” (Zack)

　Dan smiled a mature smile for a twelve-year-old and quietly countered.

“You don’t know Mel very well, Master Zack. Mel really likes you. I know it’s hard for you to understand, but I can tell you this, I see Mel the most. I know Mel better than anyone… so I…” (Dan)

　It was at this point that I realized that Dan was growing up, too. And I felt pathetic for not seeing that.

“…so, I decided to watch over him. Now I can’t give up on Mel and fall in love with another girl…” (Dan)

　I couldn’t find the words to say to him.

(Before I knew it, Dan is also growing up. …After all, it’s not like he’s doing something he’s not used to. No, maybe it was just good to know that Dan was growing up…) (Dan)

“I have a favor to ask of you, Master Zack. Mel really likes you. Please don’t avoid her because you feel like she is like your own child. This goes for my sister as well. Sharon also likes you… and I’m fine with that… I…” (Dan)

　His voice was snatched there, and I didn’t hear him finish. But I think he was going to say, “I hope you watch over them,” or “I give up.”

　Dan changed the subject in a cheerful tone to cover up the words he couldn’t get out.

“You’re taking me to Doctus, aren’t you? Aren’t there a lot of pretty girls there?” (Dan)

　In the end, he teased me with a chuckle that sounded like a crying smile.

(You’re going to be a really good man, you know. …I’ve heard that growing up is a joyful but lonely thing for a child, and it’s true. …But among the Zack Quartet, of all of us, you’re the best of us. I haven’t grown up much…) (Zack)

“Yeah, because Doctus is a vibrant city. Plus, it’s an academic city, so there are lots of young girls.” (Zack)

　Dan laughs, “That’s exciting,” and I laugh back the same way.

“But there are more guys than girls there. The competition is worse than in this village. Liddy tells me that you are quite popular among the village girls. If you’re going to chase girls, you might as well stay in the village. …Kakahahaha!” (Zack)

“That’s terrible. Masterr Zack. But I’m looking forward to it. Also, I will be together with everyone.” (Dan)

　We talked for about ten minutes after that.

　I wondered if I had a son, would I be having this conversation, and we talked about other things about men.

A/N: I didn’t have a day off, but I managed to write it on Saturday and Sunday nights.

I think I am much less polished than usual.